Christian Advice

What to Look for in a Woman

Don’t be blinded by her external beauty guys.

That is the trap that many men fall into.

They may not realize this, but they see external beauty and assume that it goes beyond skin deep.

Don’t fall into the trap of believing that because she looks good, she must be a good person.

I don’t have to tell you what to look for in terms of external beauty.

You know what you like.

But here’s what to look for in a woman in terms of internal beauty:

Beauty should be that of her inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit.

-Taken from 1 Peter 3

Does she possess a gentle and quiet spirit?

What does this mean?

It doesn’t mean she has to be an introvert.

It means she is a woman who posesses tenderness, benevolence and peace.

The opposite is a woman who is overbearing and harsh.

It might also go hand in hand with the fact that you want to avoid marrying a woman who is quarrelsome.

Overbearing and harsh has the tendency to become quarrelsome and irritating.

The book of Proverbs talks about this over and over and over again.

5 times, actually! Check it out:

Proverbs 19:13
A foolish son is his father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping.

Proverbs 21:9
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Proverbs 21:19
Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and ill-tempered wife.

Proverbs 25:24
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Proverbs 27:15,16
A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day; restraining her is like restraining the wind or grasping oil with the hand.

This kind of woman is compared to the annoying sound of dripping water.

And according to the writer, King Solomon (also known as the wisest man to have ever lived) it is better to live on the corner of a roof or the desert than to live with this kind of woman! Watch out!

So, now that you know who you should not fall for, here’s what you should look for in a woman:

Hymn to a Good Wife

A good woman is hard to find,
and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve,
and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously
all her life long.
She shops around for the best yarns and cottons,
and enjoys knitting and sewing.
She’s like a trading ship that sails to faraway places
and brings back exotic surprises.
She’s up before dawn, preparing breakfast
for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it,
then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden.
First thing in the morning, she dresses for work,
rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
She senses the worth of her work,
is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth,
diligent in homemaking.
She’s quick to assist anyone in need,
reaches out to help the poor.
She doesn’t worry about her family when it snows;
their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear.
She makes her own clothing,
and dresses in colorful linens and silks.
Her husband is greatly respected
when he deliberates with the city fathers.
She designs gowns and sells them,
brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops.
Her clothes are well-made and elegant,
and she always faces tomorrow with a smile.
When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say,
and she always says it kindly.
She keeps an eye on everyone in her household,
and keeps them all busy and productive.
Her children respect and bless her;
her husband joins in with words of praise:
“Many women have done wonderful things,
but you’ve outclassed them all!”
Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades.
The woman to be admired and praised
is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God.
Give her everything she deserves!
Festoon her life with praises!

(Taken from Proverbs 31: 10-31 The Message)

The girl’s translation:

She is rare and valuable
She’s trustworthy, generous and gracious
She has productive hobbies and values quality
She has worthwhile skills she enjoys
She’s adventurous and possesses
sponteneity, brings newness to life
She takes care of the people around her
and manages her time well
She knows how to make wise purchases,
knows how to save money,
She is innovative and not lazy,
but actually enjoys her work
She values what she can make or do
and is available until it gets done.
She knows how to manage a household.
She helps those who come to her in need.
She doesn’t let worry overtake her ’cause
she is prepared for every season.
She is crafty and allows herself
to dress beautifully. She doesn’t hide.
Her husband is respected and is
involved in matters outside the home
She is a natural business woman.
What she makes is good quality.
She is an optimist about the future.
She speaks with wisdom and kindness.
She takes care of everyone in her home
and knows how to delegate tasks.
Her children respect and bless her;
her husband joins in with words of praise:
“Many women have done wonderful things,
but you’ve outclassed them all!”
Charming women can fool you
and beauty doesn’t last forever,
but the woman who respects God,
she should get the honor.

The most important point is highlighted!

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Article written by:

I love thinking about the intricacies of dating, love and life. I share my tiny lessons in the hope that it helps you as you navigate the dating world.

Join the discussion

  1. Cory

    I’m gonna find a girl who is all of those things AND drop-dead gorgeous. mmhmm.

  2. Anonymous

    Men, listen up. Get to know the girl’s family, especially her mom because that’s probably a close approximation of what you’ll be married to after 25 years. Is her mom crabby and mean, or kind and cheerful? Does mom criticize constantly or does she have a friendly disposition? Think, guys. With the head on your shoulders. Conversely, a smart girl will get to know the guy’s dad. Does he treat his wife respectfully? Is he able to turn off the TV when he’s at home? Hormones don’t make good decisions. Think, people.

  3. MidoriLei

    “Hormones don’t make good decisions.” Nice. nice.

  4. Pingback: What to Look for in a Woman | Why Are You Single?

  5. Kelly

    Seriously? And will this perfect woman find a guy who is equally worthy of her attention? This is the problem with dating right now—everyone is expecting miracles, waiting around for something that doesn’t exist. Pick your top traits and be willing to compromise a few things.


    Incredible! This blog looks exactly like my old one!

    It’s on a totally different subject but it has pretty much the same page
    layout and design. Wonderful choice of colors!

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