I met a guy. A wonderful, stay-all-day, pack a-lunch-and-a-dinner-while-you’re-at-it-and-stay-awhile kinda guy that just makes you think, “Lord, have mercy! Closest thing to Adam (manly perfection) since, well, Adam!” Ladies, I don’t know if you’ve been in the presence of such a man as this. The Baldwin Brother meets Tom Hanks all-around good guy. I find an initial universal agreement of thought when a woman first meets such a man. Fear of malice. Doubt. Reservations. The upturned eyebrow accompanied with the unspoken thought, ” Are you genuine?”

Somehow because of the effect of our media- absorbed society and scars from our past experiences, we have subtly disassociated (use another word that means limbs are removed from body) the words “good-looking guy” from “good guy.” Media stereotypes like Joey from the TV show Friends and his one liner, “So how you doin?!” are constant reminders of this fallacy that good-looking men lack a genuine spirit of good intentions when it comes to women.

On the other hand, some plain, crowd-blending men along with some even remotely hideous males meet women and are more readily trusted. Jerks lurk behind that ugly face too, dear. I have a friend who’s ex-files are filled to the brim with ugly jerks and the man she married is gorgeous and a gentleman. Ladies, isn’t this encouraging?! All the jerks broke her heart while the gorgeous hubby-to-be caught her by surprise and whisked her away into the envied lifestyle of permanent coupledom. Like most women, she took one look at hunky hubby-to-be and presumed ill. So, she made it hard for him; she made him work for her. Then he stuck around for the challenge. In the past, she had made it easy for the other guys she dated because she assumed they weren’t jerks, but they all took off later. Like my grandma always used to tell me, “If you follow, they will run; if you run, they will follow.” But that’s another topic for another day!

All I’m saying is that looks are deceiving, but if the drop-dead gorgeous man makes you somewhat wary, and that in turn causes you to make yourself the challenge that you are, then by all means, be wary! On the opposing end, just don’t assume that behind every average Joe lies a heart of gold either. Both guys should have to work equally hard for you. It will benefit you both in the long run, because admit it, guys appreciate what they work hard for!