I’m about to go against a lot of forward thinking, modern and progressive women and men. That being said. The man should pay for the first date.
There. I said it. And now allow me to add that I am not the enemy of equality. I strongly believe that women can and do offer equal and substantial competition in the work force, family life, and in any other arena you can name.
But the man should still pay for the date.
1. Purposed to be providers
I am an independent woman. I have purchased homes, paid my bills and done all of the above on my own for years.
Doesn’t mean that I want to.
I want a partner. Someone who will work to provide for a family: me and for our children. Paying for my coffee on the first date, you are giving the smallest, tiniest, minuscule-est idea that you can and will.
I know that men are created with a need to provide for others. They have a drive that their identity is wrapped up in to go out and conquer in order to set up a life for them and theirs.
Don’t believe this? Met men that don’t do this? Exactly what is your opinion of them? (Enough said.)
2. Am I worth your time?
We are both taking time out of our schedules to meet. I’m taking time out of the million things on my to-do lists (you all know I love lists…as seen here, here, here and here).
Show me you think I am worth your time by engaging me (STAY OFF YOUR PHONE), listening to me, and paying for our date.
3. Your manners are showing
Should men open the door for a lady? Yes
Should men give up their seat for a lady? Yes
Should men pursue a woman instead of a woman pursue a man? Yes
Should men pay for the first date? YES
It is simply a matter of good manners.
If you still aren’t convinced, then call your mom and ask her what she thinks.
UhOh. What to do if she tries to pay?
Politely tell her, “I’ve got it,” or something kind. If she insists, let her pay.
I insisted on paying for my portion of the date if I was not interested in a second date. This was my strategy, but don’t get discouraged, a lot of women might not follow my lead.
UhOh. What if I can’t afford to pay?
Then wait to date until you are ready!
Don’t pick something expensive. Pick something fun and frugal. If you met online, make the initial meeting light and easy, like coffee or tea.
This is just my two cents…but any man that ever had me pay for a first date, did not get a second.