Attraction

Strang Female Behavior. Plus, What It Means When She Says “There’s No Chemistry”

(2007 myspace entry)
I’m Shy around Boys…who I’m attracted to.

If you know me, you know I am a social butterfly. Why is it then, that when I am actually attracted to a guy, I completely start getting uncomfortable with my wings and wanna hide back in my cocoon?

I completely give guys the wrong message. When I am friendly and laughing all the time, I DON’T LIKE THEM. When I completely ignore them and pretend like they don’t exist, that means they get under my skin, into my head, and into my every other waking thought.

So the first guy’s thinking,

She thinks I’m funny.

She thinks I’m fun to be around.

She is totally at ease.

She totally digs me!

When actually, it’s more like,

Yes, I think you’re funny.

Yes, you’re fun to be around.

Yes I am totally at ease.

NO, I don’t dig you.

I just don’t see you that way.

    Men, when a woman says there is “no chemistry,” it means:

  • There’s no spark.
  • AKA sexual attraction.
  • Or if you want it spelled out:

  • “No fiber in my being is compelled to jump your bones.”

Sorry, people can’t help who they are attracted to sexually. You just have to get over it and move on. Anyway, believe me, you want to be with a girl who wants to jump your bones. I promise, she’s out there. Just keep ‘lookin…

Back to my little rant. So now the second guy’s thinking:

I thought she smiled at me when we first met.

I’m totally seeing things.

Man dude, what’s happening to your game?

I can’t believe you’re losing it to that accounting guy, whats-his-name…

Dang!… I know. The dude’s a freakin Jim Carrey. Girls dig funny…

But shoot! Why’s it like she’s dodging me?

Whatever.

Move on.

Plenty of chicks on the market.

So he does move on. They move on. The entire race of attractive, single, male prospects moves on while I’m stuck in the lunch room, listening to the now slightly irritating Jim Carrey-wannabe and wishing to God that he’d take a breath and give his gaping orifice a break.

And this my dears is the plight of the socially inept singleton. And I’m giving you dating advice? LOL

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Article written by:

I love thinking about the intricacies of dating, love and life. I share my tiny lessons in the hope that it helps you as you navigate the dating world.

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  1. curious

    ohmygod! and here i thought i was the only one who behaves that way. it confuses me to no end why i do such thing especially to those that i’m interested in (like ignore, look serious)…maybe its because they make us feel uncomfortable and vulnerable (because we like them) thus we act that way??…this behaviour of mine had already ruined so many chances i had with the guy that i actually digs for. it makes me feel so hopeless sometimes…and i can’t help but wondered if maybe in the future i might actually just end up with those that i laugh, be funny, comfortable and that i don’t dig for. i’m afraid of that. wouldn’t want to let good catches past but i wouldn’t want to put myself out there too much (to the extend that he knows i dig him before i’m able to confirm that he feels the same way)..so have you overcome this? i assume this because you already managed to get the guy you want…if so, how did you overcome this? i’m curios to know…pls share :))

  2. MidoriLei

    Hi curious! there’s a way to be friendly without giving away the fact that you are interested before he makes that clear to you. Just be friendly and fun! I overcame not acting like myself by just accepting the fact that I shouldn’t care if he likes me or not… better he reject the real me than the fake me! does that answer your question? If not, let me know:)

  3. Ashley

    i did that at one point with a guy that i thought was everything i wanted. I even got the chance to go out with him once, but… it just didn’t feel right anymore, because i met the guy i’m with now. 🙂 and i realized that everyone that i once had an attraction for, is just more of a friend now.

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