Everyone wants to find love. Find the right love. Find the love that melts your knees, makes the world rosy red while flower petals fall at your feet and you float by on a cloud pulled by unicorns.
I want this type of love, so I switch on netflix and find some type of happy ending romantic comedy.
Because that is the beginning of love, but not all of love.
Love is a decision.
We decide who we will invest our time with. Who we will trust with our emotions, with our wants and needs. We decide if we can go to the final mile with this person, or if we are hanging on in hopes it will get better.
Love starts off slow and creeps up on you. All of sudden you’re in a whirlwind of emotion, where this person’s actions effect your emotions more than food.
And if you are one of the ones that wins the lottery, gets a person with good character, makes it past your flaws and their flaws, you commit. Hopefully, eventually, for life.
And everything is easy from there: Cue the unicorns.
NOT. It all gets so much harder. Even their breathing starts to irritate you, because you just know they are using too much oxygen.
This is when love really becomes a decision.
You have committed to this person. This is when character really counts. And why, when dating, it is so important to make the right choice, and that you know yourself well enough (my number 1 rule for dating) that you chose someone who is right for you.
Because when you decide to invest your time, energy and effort with someone, you will fall in love. You will have wonderful emotions stronger than cravings for food. You will grow together, admire each other’s quirks and strengths and want to help and support your partner. And when those amazing butterfly-walking-on-cloud-9 and those they-are-0h-so-perfect-hormones-and-feelings fade, you are left with your beautiful choice and your correct decision to love this person.
So, pick who you will carefully. Pick with prayer. Pick with time and pick with eyes open. Pick with gentleness for your heart and for theirs. And pick with a tenacious spirit. Because love is a beautiful decision, but not an easy one.
