Christian Advice

Ladies, BEWARE the Charmer

A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

“Charm is deceitful…but a woman/man who fears the Lord shall be praised.”

I know a love story turned horror story, and I hope that when you read this, it’s just a word of caution and not your own story.

I met this man who is so completely charming and charismatic.

He’s attentive when he talks to you; he asks you questions that make you feel like he really is interested in your life.

He’s confident, shows no signs of being nervous or intimidated by women, and is the life of the party.

He has lofty dreams and is very, very ambitious.

On the outside, he is winsome, handsome, and all smiles and jokes.

Ladies, does he fit many traits that are on your list of dream guy?


Which is why I’m SHOCKED…

I found out later that he abused his wife, has a terrible temper, and his wife is afraid to leave him because of his verbal threats.

Everyone who really knows him is afraid to get on his bad side because they don’t want to see the monster get out.

If anyone mentions anything about this stuff to him, he gets defensive.

There’s nothing worse than a man who can’t even see his own flaws.

It’s the very opposite of meek.

Let me Introduce You to a “Christian Monster”

To top it off, he is a very outspoken Christian.

He throws religion in your face, to the point where it makes other people feel awkward or uncomfortable.

He is the very definition of a hypocrite, and it makes me angry that a man like him is allowed to take on the name of “Christian.”

To be a Christian is to be a “Christ follower.”

I’m so utterly perplexed by this kind of Christian.

And I feel for the secular world.

Christians have brought on the inquisition, one of the darkest times in history.

Cruelty in the name of Christ is the worst thing.

I understand why so many people are turned off by Christianity, when there are monsters, wife abusers, like this guy, who parade around like a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

He wears a title but goes home and lives a very different kind of life, a life that proves his religion, his spirituality is only for show.

The difference between calling yourself a “Christian” and “fearing the Lord”

He may be calling himself a Christian, but he does not, like the verse above says, “fear the Lord.”

Fearing the Lord would cause you to think twice before you strike your wife, before you threaten her.

When you fear the Lord, you know who’s boss, and it’s not you.

You know that your actions have real consequences both on this earth and eternally.

This man doesn’t fear the Lord.

When a man fears the Lord, he has a weighty respect for God’s wrath.

He knows that he has to answer to someone very powerful (powerful enough to send him to hell).

A Word of Caution to the Ladies

And mostly, I feel for his wife, and for all the women out there who fall prey to these charmers.

They start out believing they have just entered their own real life version of a fairy tale complete with prince “charming” only to wake up 6 months down the road realizing it’s no fairy tale.

It’s a horror story.

This is why I want to admonish all the women reading this,


Give it a year, maybe two.

Make sure that year is face to face, not long distance.

    If he seems too perfect, honey, it’s too soon.

    If you don’t know his flaws yet, WAIT.

Make sure you know what you’re REALLY getting into.

Make sure you know exactly what his flaws are, so you can decide, without the permanency of a marriage covenant, whether or not you can live with those flaws.

    If he seems too good to be true, he probably is.

If you’re still beaming from your infatuation high, I just want to give you a reality check now before it’s too late.

Don’t get me wrong.

Relationships can be amazing…

But remember, it’s still two imperfect people in an imperfect relationship.

And if your partner or your relationship still seems too perfect, WAIT.

Don’t just rush into a marriage because you want to be married so badly and you’ve checked it off your list:

He’s a Christian.


There are “Christian” monsters.

“Charm is deceitful.”

Don’t be deceived by the charmers.

And my last piece of advice for the ladies?

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I love thinking about the intricacies of dating, love and life. I share my tiny lessons in the hope that it helps you as you navigate the dating world.

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