For Guys

If She Really Loved Me and Love is Forever, Will We Get Back Together in the Future?


A Reader wrote me this:

    My girlfriend broke up with me a few months ago, after two very loving years
    together. In fact, just days before she broke up with me, she was telling me she
    loved me, and I beleive it was genuine and true. I think she understands deep
    down that it was love and that it’s not something that can just go away.

    So, my question is; If love is everlasting, something that doesn’t go away once
    it’s in place, will she realise this someday?
    Obviously how she acts upon that
    would depend on circumstances at the time…she’s a bit younger than me, at 21,
    maybe it’ll take her a while to figure this out. But do you think that
    eventually, if she genuinely felt she loved me at some point, she would change
    her mind, and want to share her life with me?

My Response:

    …Age does play a huge role in defining love.

    Love is this thing that is eternal, but when you’re young, you feel invincible.

    You don’t think about death.

    You think you have a whole life ahead of you.

    You think the people you love will always be there.

    So although love is forever, life is not, and a young person who hasn’t grasped this concept will take love forgranted, thinking they have all the time in the world to love and be loved.

    Whenever I take love forgranted, I try to remember how fragile life is.

    I think about the people I love and try to remember that they will one day be gone.

    I think about my life, and how I don’t know how long I will live too! When I grasp these concepts…

    When I think about life in terms of the reality of death, I care more deeply about the people I love.

    I hold on to them.

    I want to spend all my time loving them because I know it won’t last forever.

    Nothing on this earth lasts forever because we are only alive a short amount of time to experience it.

    Now, will this woman come back and learn to love you forever? I don’t know. Only time will tell. If she somehow experiences things that make her realize these concepts I’ve just mentioned, she’ll be on her way to appreciating love instead of taking it forgranted. This is if she really loved you.

    On the other hand, she might be looking for more from love than what you two shared. This is sad, but it is also a possiblity. I don’t know if I believe in soul mates, but I do believe that you can be happier with some people than others. It’s only a matter of time– she’ll figure out if she is happier with you or with someone else.

    I’m sorry if some of this is sad to hear, but I will always give you my honest opinion.

    p.s. if you want me to give you more insights I will have to know WHY she said she broke up with you.

Here’s an example of a reader’s query and my response. Please don’t hesitate to email me your personal dating concerns. I don’t have it all figured out, but I’m willing to give you my humble take on your situation:)

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I love thinking about the intricacies of dating, love and life. I share my tiny lessons in the hope that it helps you as you navigate the dating world.

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