Today’s guest post is from Stephanie. She is a personal development blogger at Beautifully Changed. She focuses on enhancing relationships, love, and happiness.
How To Get A Second Date
This incredible date just ended. You are super excited to get to know this person. BUT…. They don’t want to go on a second date. What the crap?! How does this keep happening?
I work part time for an online dating site, and there is a very common theme. One is interested in going on a second date while the other one has no interest at all. These are some of the tips I like to give after common complaints I have gathered from my after date interviews, along with dating experiences from those around me, including mine.
7 Things You Can Do To Line Up That Second Date
1. Be interested in them. Yes, you have amazing stories and your time to share will come. However, ask questions and listen to how your date responds. Then ask follow up questions. When your date asks you a question back, answer of course. Your goal is to make the majority of the conversation about your date. Again, be interested in them. People love to talk about themselves. Maybe even lean in when listening and make eye contact.
2. Skip the movie. Plan dates that are a bit more fun than eating and watching a movie. Most people don’t really enjoy eating in front of someone they are just getting to know. Maybe plan a fun, low-key activity instead that you can do before the meal. Make your date memorable. Smile, laugh, and have fun. My first date with my husband was at the dog park in the morning. He brought hot chocolates. I melted.
3. If there is an option to dance and your date wants to dance. Dance.
4. Compliment your date. Try and go a bit deeper than “nice outfit” or “cool hair.” Though if you need to give a more general compliment like “you look nice” to warm up… go right ahead. The goal here is to find something you can compliment about their character as you listen to them share about themselves.
5. If you are enjoying yourself, find a time to have a gentle touch. This can be a brush of the hands, arm, or possibly the back. Touch can help us determine if we have chemistry. Did the touch have us wanting more or to stay in the friend zone?
6. Dress as if you are on a date, not like you are hanging with your buds at the gym or working on your car. Take care of your hygiene. Look nice, while still maintaining who you are.
7. Finally, be authentic and genuine. Be yourself. Pretending you like something when you don’t or vise versa will back fire on you if the relationship does develop. Think positive about yourself and show your date the awesome stuff you bring to the table.
Dates are a time for fun while getting to know someone. Yet, it can be frustrating when second dates seem to be a myth. I encourage you to try out these tips and see if your second date success rate increases.
Also, if second dates don’t happen even with all the different tips you are trying, it might have nothing to do with you. It could be the dates you are choosing. Are they looking for a relationship or just wanting to go on dates? Maybe it really is about them going through their own stuff.
Remain positive with what you offer and who you are.
What other tips would you give to get a second date?